Today's YATM newsletter is brought to you by...
Lee and the team from our friends Baggette + Co. Wealth Management
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Hey YATMers, I’m Nick Whitnell. I’m a regenerative business consultant and soulful coach. I have a deep-rooted passion for reshaping the way we work and live.
After years of corporate life, I made a daring decision and stepped away from my leadership role at one of the UK’s most loved brands to follow my heart and launch Daring Works.
As a trained B Leader and co-Chair of our B Local, I’m an active member of the progressive B Corp Community.
Here I am with some of my favourite books. And my top recommendation from these is the wonderful ‘Intuition’ by Amisha Ghadiali.
Let's make sure we connect today.
Here I am on LinkedIn
Here is my Daring Works newsletter
I'm hosting the ‘Re-invention’ themed Lunch Club on 10th April, in Poole. I’d love you to join us, come and book here.
You can’t serve everyone, drawing lines clarifies who your work is meant for.
When you try to appeal to everyone, your message loses depth.
Seth Godin articulates this well: "It’s more important to be the best in a specific category than to aim for broad, generic appeal."
The challenge is to move past the default setting of welcoming everyone and recognise that exclusion, when it’s done fairly is worthwhile.
The Natural Tendency To Please Everyone
One thing is certain: you will never run out of strangers.
Work created often leads us to think in terms of scale. Whether we are renting advertising space for greater exposure, aiming for a wider reach on social media, or aspirations to go viral, our goal can be to maximise our numbers.
Mass appeal results in a watered-down identity. It’s a party playlist trying to keep everyone happy.
I want to make it hard for people to get in. This means that when people do step in, there is a feeling of exclusivity.
It’s my way of saying, ‘I’ve created this for you, do you want to come?’ It doesn’t necessarily have to involve money; it could simply require providing an email address to receive a newsletter.
Jessica Lackey and Meg Casebolt share interesting insights around this in the latest Aggressively Human podcast, listen below, it's great....
Learning To Embrace Selectivity
Over the years, I have learned that people with a shared vision will come together when the time is right for them.
I’ve always believed we can build our lives on our own terms, without being overly reliant on algorithms and ads. We don’t have to conform; we can connect with others who appreciate us for who we truly are.
Take YATM Creator Day. In the past, my instinct was that success was based on everyone to come. After all, that’s what makes an event successful, right? But experience has shown me that the right audience is far more valuable than a large one. For me, this is around 250 to 300 people, not dreaming of 1,000+
The attendees are predominantly made up of subscribers to the Thursday newsletter which has an audience size of 2,000.
This has helped create a sense of familiarity among people. As a result, an unwritten etiquette develops, where attendees are likely to meet like-minded people.
This is different from going to an event where someone may have an agenda to network and sell to as many people as possible, where they have no affiliation to what YATM represents. That starts to create an uneven playing field.
When the wrong people participate, the experience changes. By contrast, when the right people come together, they lean in, collaborate, and form lasting relationships.
The 2025 Creator Day theme is ‘relevance,’ which perfectly encapsulates this idea. We are not here for everyone, nor should we be.
YATM is about ownership, interdependence, experimentation, support and community. That means defining who we are not for is just as important as defining who we are for.
Exclusion In Building
I have learned over the years that belonging isn’t about being universally accepted or fitting what the industry expects from you, it’s about finding your people who accept you as you are.
The paradox of inclusion is that it’s strengthened by exclusion; when people see that a space is designed for them specifically, they engage more fully.
Let me explain what I mean:
Gated access (such as Lunch Clubs, Creator Day) this ensures that people have a genuine interest in being part of the community. I want to avoid situations where people can choose not to attend free events at the last minute.
A distinct tone and energy. YATM is not a buttoned-up B2B networking group; it’s creative, high-energy, and built around participation. For instance, at Lunch Club we start with a challenge. To a lot of people this isn’t for them and has been commented to me that this is at a business event is ‘childish and frivolous.’ To me, that’s perfect.
A clear philosophy. We emphasise a DIY approach to marketing and building communities outside of algorithm-driven platforms. If you’re all-in on living your life on social media to meet people, YATM might not be the right fit.
When you can define exclusion, you become clear on who belongs.
Some Steps To Implement Fair Exclusion
Here’s how to apply this principle in your work:
1. Set Clear Boundaries
Define who your work is for and who it’s not for.
WHY?
- YATM is for people who find happiness in not fitting in. It is not for those focused on delivering what an industry has always expected from them. Appearance, behavior, and delivery are all important.
- If you run a membership or even an event, make it clear what kind of people will thrive in it (and who won’t).
2. Create a Safe, Aligned Space
A strong community is one where people feel at home.
WHY?
- Those who resonate with your values will feel like they belong.
- Instead of chasing engagement from everyone, focus on deepening connections with those who align with your vision and then start introducing each other.
3. Keep Returning To Your Core Reason
Your idea or mission should be an anchor.
WHY?
- It keeps you from mimicking trends just to fit in.
- It ensures your message remains real and compelling to the right audience.
4. Focus On Keeping Away From The Pack
You have to resist the urge to blend in.
WHY?
- If I stuck to traditional marketing topics, I’d be competing with countless others. Instead, I focus on what makes YATM different, its high-energy, interactive, and DIY approach.
- The more distinct your perspective, the more irreplaceable you become.
5. Expand Your Perspective, But Stay True to Your Core
As your work evolves, you provide a valid reason for new people to find you.
WHY?
- Delivering events and a place to share your ideas to an opted in audience (not always social) allow fresh audiences to engage, but your core principles remain the same.
- Document your journey openly, even if when ideas didn’t hit home. You do this so people can decide whether they see themselves in your journey.
6. Don’t Be Afraid to Break the Mold
When you believe in something deeply, stand by it.
WHY?
- By taking a bold stance, you make it easier for people to choose you.
- When people see that a space has been nurtured specifically for them, it strengthens their loyalty.
Let’s Round-Up
Instead of feeling guilty about exclusion, use it as an opportunity to strengthen connections.
While communities and businesses strive for inclusivity, true belonging comes from selectivity.
The most impactful hosts are those who curate their guest list, ensuring that everyone in the room shares the same energy, enthusiasm, and commitment. This way, everyone gets a chance to contribute.
Fair exclusion is not about shutting people out, it’s about creating the right environment where the right people can feel a part of the whole experience.
Time Wasting
A website that sends you to another website you didn't know about.
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This Week Around The Web
GROWTH, CREATION & YOUR INDEPENDENCE
Addiction is now so culturally normalised - from Mitch Joel
Building your body of work - from Ellen Donnelly
THE COMMUNITY YOU CAN BUILD
The art of listening to your community - from Good Community
Heavy ChatGPT users tend to be more lonely - from The Guardian
GROWING YOUR NEWSLETTER
Is there some class teaching this Direct Message nonsense - from Robert Rose
How to grow a creator-based newsletter business - fron Digiday
Creator Day '25 opens with a Hall Of Fame event.
Read more here and the people who make our first step into the hallowed corridors of Bournemouth University. This event is free to all as we want to step into the week with a bang.
If you haven't booked for the main occasion, take the TeamYATM code to save £45, book here and I'll see you on the Creator Day fortnightly email and then give you a BIG warm welcome in Poole. We're better together.
The Others, With You
When you find a space with other people it helps build confidence.
Being surrounded by supportive and encouraging people makes it easier to take risks and grow.
Creating isn’t a solo endeavour. The people around you, your community, can reflect back the confidence you don’t yet see in yourself.
People Of YATM
"For me, You Are the Media is something unique.
It’s a business community that doesn’t go in for a lot of card swapping and self-promotion.
It’s a group of people who share their knowledge generously and who learn and figure things out together.
Online and in person, YATM is a supportive environment where everybody contributes and everybody gets something back."
Come and join in
Every week, always activity with YATM...
🏡 This morning at 9.15 is when we Work Together in YATM Club, join here
🍕 Thursday 3rd April is YATM Lunch Club London, book here
💥 Thursday 10th April is YATM Lunch Club Poole, book here
Click here for the end of newsletter video. I'll see you soon.
I'm also giving a huge best of luck today to John Espirian, Gus Bhandal and Jeremy Freeman who have UpLift Live in Birmingham today ❤️
